Finally I had such a good weekend. Spent it with family and great friends. It was much needed. Had a bbq yesterday and everyone came over. Melissa and I made up. Lyss and jazmine hung out and played on the trampoline together. Tiff and I were shocked.:) food was great and the company was even better. I got some much needed snuggle time with mah love.

Things seem to be looking up for me as far as dealing with this depression and serious mood swings:( whew! It was rough for a while.
So glad to have the few people I do:) they kinda rock.
Things with Joel are finally better which is soooooo awesome!
The coffee today tastes especially good today:) lol
Denny and I had family therapy with alyssa well I kinda sat and listened while The entire conversation was about dani. Go figure! But few things set in place so that lyss and her dad can get back their relationship.
I don't know what is going to happen with lyss but I do know her and I have a great relationship. She tells me everything. I mean eevveerryyyyything some things I can live without knowing. Lol I mean don't get me wrong she has a smart mouth and always could use an attitude adjustment but what 12 yr old don't.

It's soooo annoying. Omg I seriously don't know what to do but it's become very bothersome. If it's not an " accidental " phone call three times a month it's random friend requests and now on pinterest with nothing but rude things to say. Just leave me alone how bout that. Your wife and I are not friends anymore so why hit me up we were friends only were b.c of your wife......taking immature stabs at me is getting ridiculous to say the least.
Now I was told to " leave you the fuck alone " get a life blah blah yet I feel like I am being stalked. Random pics sent to my email the other day followed by a FB friend request. Just stoppppppp! I don't bother you we are not a part of eachothers lives anymore haven't been for a longgg time. Let me be. It's weird if things were going so great in your life why I would be of such priority grrrrrr.

So typically I wouldn't even waste my time blogging about something like this but it's really frustrating when someone is purposely being shitty to you for absolutely No reason.

I am not working b.c of all the things that have went on with my oldest. The amount of appointments and things I have to do daily can be very overwhelming to say the least.
Sorry your pissed at me for not freeing up my appointments to accommodate yours but in my world my kids come first.
You dogg out your friends on FB for not dropping what they are doing to help you out yet your ghost when your friends need something even just a phone call.
I absolutely do not have time in my life to deal with a so called friend who requires such attention. It's ridiculous that you would assume that everyone of your friends will just be at your beckon call. If you need something ask. Don't expect us to track you down and beg you to watch your kids like seriously. I offered and you declined sooooo to try and put some shit out on FB making it out to be that you have some shady friends is bull shit. Then when I ask about it u purposely ignore me.
Aren't we adults here.....
Your reason is you didn't want to drive in a circle well sorry but sometimes you have to if that means u have a sitter. And welcome to be ing a mom. I can't tell you how many times I have worried every day about not having a sitter. It's part of life it's part of being a mom.

I am so livid at how absolutely spoiled rotten you are acting. I don't have time to chase u and beg u to let me watch ur kids. You tell me No problem u got it covered yet your posts on fb are a direct insult to me and tiff. Who might I add was at work all day. And yes I enjoyed the nice day with my son so freaking what. Where the hell do u get off being mad at anyone about enjoying a nice day with their kids.
I can't even describe how disrespected I feel right now and I am seriously considering even being your friend anymore. I call u don't answer I text u don't respond I offer u ignore me so that's your fault your bad. Sorry sweetie but the world does not revolve around you.
Ohh and I even offered to go with you to your appointments and yet I'm shitty what everrr

It's really hard to trust anyone these days. The people you once thought were there for you tend to let you down a lot. People are very selfish and it's pretty pathetic.
I like doing things to help out my friends might not be a lot at times but I do what I can and I do it not to expect something in return. So many people will help you or attempt to do things to help and then you realize it was a complete set up b.c what they were really doing was testing you to see if you are willing to do the same regardless of circumstances.

I don't understand why people insist on pretending life is so grand and perfect and lovely! Makes me sick how fake ppl will be just so others view them in a certain wayyy! Esp via fb. It's quite laughable but me I will just keep it real although I don't post it on FB life sucks. Always has and always will I assume!!!! I can't help but wonder where life is taking me if only I could see even a year from now that would be helpful. My baby girl is having thyroid issues and now we have to see a specialist at children's hospital. Damn I was just there with my baby boy. Oh and that was quite an interesting day for me. Grandpa shows up with his new wife and her daughter brandi <- hate herrr and her kid who conviently enough is having surgery same day and time as brayden ha what are the odds lol out of all the people to see it had to be him and them. Mom kept her cool which I was proud of .....he didn't say a word to me or my son or my mom he did however speak yo ray which was weird. I guess it bothers me b.c I know my oma would have been there for us and seeing him reminds me of just how fucked up this family really was. I mean I don't consider him family haven't for a long time but the memories still bother me. Enjoy my gmas money and house and cars.... God don't like ugly and u will have to answer to someone for your actions. I don't understand why life brings people together at the same place and time like what the he'll is the meaning of it. The point of it all is to be understood! I am glad and so very thankful for my mother she truly is my best friend I don't know what I would do without her in my life. She is the only one who has stood by me thru it all good bad and ugly. I can't imagine my life without my mom she truly is my saving grace! I may not have a ton of family and a ton of friends but the few people in my life that are family and friends I truly cherish! Depression is No joke and I have been battling with it for a little while now and some days are good and other days not soooo much! But No matter what I know I have somewhat of a support system. I don't know how to pull myself out of this funk it's pretty painful on most days......I barely have the motivation to get out of bed it's my kids who keep me going and somehow for my babies I am able to find the strength to get shit done!!!! Although my daughter gives me more gray hair than desired her and brayden are my world and without them I would have nothing to live for. No desire to do anything. On another note my life is much more in order than it was even a year ago. Gosh I wouldn't change a single thing that has happened in the past.... well okay maybe I would change a few things but nothing major. Everything happens for a reason. Ahhhhh it's been so long since I last blogged