Fake it to make it.  

Posted by: Angel

I don't understand why people insist on pretending life is so grand and perfect and lovely! Makes me sick how fake ppl will be just so others view them in a certain wayyy! Esp via fb. It's quite laughable but me I will just keep it real although I don't post it on FB life sucks. Always has and always will I assume!!!! I can't help but wonder where life is taking me if only I could see even a year from now that would be helpful. My baby girl is having thyroid issues and now we have to see a specialist at children's hospital. Damn I was just there with my baby boy. Oh and that was quite an interesting day for me. Grandpa shows up with his new wife and her daughter brandi <- hate herrr and her kid who conviently enough is having surgery same day and time as brayden ha what are the odds lol out of all the people to see it had to be him and them. Mom kept her cool which I was proud of .....he didn't say a word to me or my son or my mom he did however speak yo ray which was weird. I guess it bothers me b.c I know my oma would have been there for us and seeing him reminds me of just how fucked up this family really was. I mean I don't consider him family haven't for a long time but the memories still bother me. Enjoy my gmas money and house and cars.... God don't like ugly and u will have to answer to someone for your actions. I don't understand why life brings people together at the same place and time like what the he'll is the meaning of it. The point of it all is to be understood! I am glad and so very thankful for my mother she truly is my best friend I don't know what I would do without her in my life. She is the only one who has stood by me thru it all good bad and ugly. I can't imagine my life without my mom she truly is my saving grace! I may not have a ton of family and a ton of friends but the few people in my life that are family and friends I truly cherish! Depression is No joke and I have been battling with it for a little while now and some days are good and other days not soooo much! But No matter what I know I have somewhat of a support system. I don't know how to pull myself out of this funk it's pretty painful on most days......I barely have the motivation to get out of bed it's my kids who keep me going and somehow for my babies I am able to find the strength to get shit done!!!! Although my daughter gives me more gray hair than desired her and brayden are my world and without them I would have nothing to live for. No desire to do anything. On another note my life is much more in order than it was even a year ago. Gosh I wouldn't change a single thing that has happened in the past.... well okay maybe I would change a few things but nothing major. Everything happens for a reason. Ahhhhh it's been so long since I last blogged

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